Where to find the answers to the questions that adults keep stumbling over!


"Why God Made Moms"

Answers given by elementary school age children to the following questions:

Why did God make mothers?

1. She's the only one who knows where the scotch tape is.
2. Mostly to clean the house.
3. To help us out of there when we were getting born.

How did God make mothers?

1. He used dirt, just like for the rest of us.
2. Magic plus super powers and a lot of stirring.
3. God made my Mom just the same like he made me. He just used bigger parts.

What ingredients are mothers made of?

1. God makes mothers out of clouds and angel hair and everything nice in the world and one dab of mean.
2. They had to get their start from men's bones. Then they mostly use string, I think.

Why did God give you to your mother and not some other Mom?

1. We're related.
2. God knew she likes me a lot more than other people's moms like me.

What kind of little girl was your Mom?

1. My Mom has always been my Mom and none of that other stuff.
2. I don't know because I wasn't there, but my guess would be pretty bossy.
3. They say she used to be nice.

What did Mom need to know about dad before she married him?

1. His last name.
2. She had to know his background. Like is he a crook? Does he get drunk on beer?
3. Does he make at least $800 a year? Did he say NO to drugs and YES to chores?

Why did your Mom marry your dad?

1. My dad makes the best spaghetti in the world. And my Mom eats a lot.
2. She got too old to do anything else with him.
3. My grandma says that Mom didn't have her thinking cap on.

Who's the boss at your house?

1. Mom doesn't want to be boss, but she has to because dad's such a goof ball.
2. Mom. You can tell by room inspection. She sees the stuff under the bed.
3. I guess Mom is, but only because she has a lot more to do than dad.

What's the difference between moms and dads?

1. Moms work at work & work at home, & dads just go to work at work.
2. Moms know how to talk to teachers without scaring them.
3. Dads are taller & stronger, but moms have all the real power 'cause
that's who you got to ask if you want to sleep over at your friend's.
4. Moms have magic, they make you feel better without medicine.

What does your Mom do in her spare time?

1. Mothers don't do spare time.
2. To hear her tell it, she pays bills all day long.

What would it take to make your Mom perfect?

1. On the inside she's already perfect. Outside, I think some kind of plastic surgery.
2. Diet. You know, her hair. I'd diet, maybe blue.

If you could change one thing about your Mom, what would it be?

1. She has this weird thing about me keeping my room clean. I'd get rid of that.
2. I'd make my Mom smarter. Then she would know it was my sister who did it and not me.
3. I would like for her to get rid of those invisible eyes on her back.


THE MOMMY TEST

I was out walking with my 4 year old daughter. She picked up something off the ground and started to put it in her mouth. I took the item away from her and I asked her not to do that.

"Why?" my daughter asked.

"Because it's been laying outside, you don't know where it's been, it's dirty and probably has germs" I replied.

At this point, my daughter looked at me with total admiration and asked, "Wow! How do you know all this stuff?"

"Uh," ...I was thinking quickly, "All moms know this stuff. It's on the Mommy Test. You have to know it, or they don't let you be a Mommy."

We walked along in silence for 2 or 3 minutes, but she was evidently pondering this new information. "OH...I get it!" she beamed, "So if you don't pass the test you have to be the daddy."

"Exactly" I replied back with a big smile on my face and joy in my heart.


CHURCH IS OUT!

"Dear Lord," the preacher began with arms extended and a rapturous look on his upturned face, "without you we are but dust..."

He would have continued, but at that moment one very obedient little girl (who was listening carefully) leaned over to her mother and asked quite audibly in her shrill little girl voice, "Mommy, WHAT is BUTT DUST?"

Church was pretty much over at that point...

A dear friend sent me this today. There is not much I can say to add to the wonder of it. If any of us are having even the smallest problems that are addressed on this site, or even if we are just fine, please take a few minutes to view this.

A true LOVE ME/LOVE YOU part of my blog:

http://www.thedashmovie.com

Made some changes to the 'look' here, simply because my eyes were getting very fatigued from the 'flare' of the original white background.

Since this particular blog is meant to see things more in 'black and white', rather than shades of grey or passion pink, I decided to reverse the set-up and it really is much more comfortable, to me, at least. I hope it sits well with you all.

HMMMMM, We have a problem, NASA. ROTFL I've been trying for a long time now to get the 'comments' section of the new color organization to 'show' the comments, and other things in that area. If you highlight the comment, it will show, but I'm stumped on how to change the colors so that you don't have to. Any help will be appreciated. TYVM

Well, whatever I was doing wrong, I finally did right. LOL Comments are working AOK now. Thanks for your patience.

I found this clipping on a forum today, and it started me wondering about the Goth Culture in our youth today. I really never paid much attention to those kids who look like they are in perpetual mourning, because I've lived through the eras of bobby socks and hoop skirts; hippy fringe, flowers and shawl; ankle length skirts and calf boots; and even now we are seeing down around the butt baggy pants, and pierced navel over the belt looks--along with the Goths ghosting along on our schools, streets and malls.

I have seen enough to know, that if kids live long enough, they outgrow most of the really outlandish acting out clothes, and sooner or later blend into whatever is the more conservative attire of the times. However, I am probably naive in not knowing that there are sets of behavior that go along with certain fads, some of them dangerous both to the kids and those around them. This article sort of jarred me awake to that issue.

While I am not 100% into breaking anyone from their present fetish into an equally overwhelming religious one, I have to agree that IMO, these kids need to have more parental and responsible adult guidance. Lines have got to be drawn as to what will be acceptible and SURELY unsupervised internet/chat access cannot be part of the family plan for raising healthy, responsible, children.

And now: GOTHS

http://www.bandlink.net/forum/topic.asp?ARCHIVE=true&TOPIC_ID=34610

Body: This is a newsletter that St. Mary's church in Colorado Springs sent out this week:

If Your Child is a Gothic, Reform Through the Lord!

Listed below are some warning signs to indicate if your child may have gone astray from the Lord. Gothic (or goth) is a very obscure and often dangerous culture that young teenagers are prone to participating in.

The gothic culture leads young, susceptible minds into an imagined world of evil, darkness, and violence. Please seek immediate attention through counselling, prayer, and parental guidance to rid your child of Satan's temptations if five or more of the following are applicable to your child:

-Frequently wears black clothing.

-Wears band and/or rock t-shirts.

-Wears excessive black eye makeup, lipstick or nailpolish.

-Wears any odd, silver jewelry or symbols. Some of these include: reversed crosses, pentagrams, pentacles, ankhs or various other Satanic worshipping symbols.

-Shows an interest in piercings or tattoos.

-Listens to gothic or any other anti-social genres of music. (Marilyn Manson claims to be the anti-Christ, and publicly speaks against the Lord. Please discard any such albums IMMEDIATELY.)

-Associates with other people that dress, act or speak eccentrically.

-Shows a declining interest in wholesome activities, such as: the Bible, prayer, church or sports.

-Shows an increasing interest in death, vampires, magic, the occult, witchcraft or anything else that involves Satan.

-Takes drugs.

-Drinks alcohol.

-Is suicidal and/or depressed.

-Cuts, burns or partakes in any other method of self-mutilation. (This is a Satanic ritual that uses pain to detract from the light of God and His love. Please seek immediate attention for this at your local mental health center.)

-Complains of boredom.

-Sleeps too excessively or too little.

-Is excessively awake during the night.

-Dislikes sunlight or any other form of light. (This pertains to vampires promoting the idea that His light is of no use.)

-Demands an unusual amount of privacy.

-Spends large amounts of time alone.

-Requests time alone and quietness. (This is so that your child may speak to evil sprits through meditation.)

-Insists on spending time with friends while unaccompanied by an adult.

-Disregards authority figures; teachers, priests, nuns and elders are but a few examples of this.

-Misbehaves at school.

-Misbehaves at home.

-Eats goth-related foods. Count Dracula cereal is an example of this.

-Drinks blood or expresses an interest in drinking blood.

(Vampires believe this is how to attain Satan. This act is very dangerous and should be stopped immediately.)

-Watches cable television or any other corrupted media sources. (Ask your local church for proper programs that your child may watch.)

-Plays videos games that contains violence or are of a role-playing nature.

-Uses the internet excessively and frequently makes time for the computer.

-Makes Satanic symbols and/or violently shakes head to music.

-Dances to music in a provocative or sexual manner.

Nancy says: The following three listings are very religion related, IMO, and I just don't believe that only 'Goths' participate in such humanly universal actions and desires. Show me a young person that doesn't have at least ONE of the following three behaviors, and I'll show you one in a coma.

-Expresses an interest in sex.

-Masturbates

-Is homosexual and/or bisexual.

Nancy says: (Another listing that is selective as to Christianity being the only valid religion, IMO)

-Pursues dangerous cult religions. Such include: Satanism, Scientology, Philosophy, Paganism, Wicca, Hinduism and Buddhism.

-Wears pins, stickers or anything else that contains these various phrases: "I'm so gothic, I'm dead", "woe is me", "I'm a goth".

-Claims to be a goth.

If five or more of these apply to your child, please intervene immediately. The gothic culture is dangerous and Satan thrives within it. If any of these problems persist, enlist your child into your local mental health center.

~St. Mary's Catholic Church


Of course, if adequate parenting existed in the first place, children would not be involved in the lonesome world of Goths, IMO. It really is a bigger problem than I ever conceived.

Co-incidentally, I watched a presentation on American Justice yesterday that told of a group of 5 teenagers, age 14 to 17 who were goths, out of control, and who ended up killing 4 of a 5 member Mormon family, just for their VAN! The youngest survived but is maimed for life.

All the killers (and that is what they were, no "poor 14 year olds" here) were given Life without parole. Now they are REALLY 'dead' to the wonders of the world.

from "bullyonline" UK



There are all kinds of families. The traditional, "pop, mom, kids, and ‘outlaws’", religious families, and any other group of people that come together for their mutual benefit for a period of some time. In each and every family there may be and often is a bully or a control freak or an abuser of more or lesser danger to the others. I’ve tried to put together some material from “Bully On Line” (and families, in whatever degree of friendship or maliciousness do exist on line), that people who are hurting or worrying about the disfunction brought to a family by that person, might find enlightening and maybe beneficial. I hope it helps whoever needs it.


Bullying in the family

Dealing with a serial bully, psychopath or sociopath in the family
Issues: bullying relations, family bullying, abusive partners, abusive relationships, power, control, domination, subjugation, manipulation, intimidation, narcissism, attention seeking, arrogance, fear, shame, embarrassment, guilt, denial


Whilst the focus of Bully OnLine is bullying in the workplace, the serial bully at work is a serial bully at home and in the community. All serial bullies have been through school and all have families and neighbours. An increasing number of enquiries come from people dealing with family bullying.

The violence committed by a serial bully is almost entirely psychological, for psychological violence leaves no scars and no physical evidence. Most commonly the violence takes the form of verbal abuse and emotional abuse including trivial nit-picking criticism, constant fault-finding combined with a simultaneous refusal to recognise, value, acknowledge and praise. Manipulation, isolation and exclusion are other favourite tactics, as is feigning victimhood or persecution, especially when held accountable.

The objectives of serial bullies are Power, Control, Domination and Subjugation. These are achieved by a number of means including disempowerment, the stimulation of excessive levels of fear, shame, embarrassment and guilt, manipulation (especially of emotions and perceptions), ritual humiliation and constant denial.

When you live with someone who is constantly denying what they said or did a day ago, or an hour ago, or even a minute ago, it drives you crazy. When the symptoms of injury to health start to become apparent, the bully will tell others you have a "mental health problem". You may be mad, but this is not mad insane, this is mad angry.

Control is a common indicator of the serial bully at home - control of finances, control of movements, control over choice of friends, control of the right to work, control over what to think, and so on. All are designed to disempower.